In film and television, homicide survivors (families, loved ones, or close friends of the murdered person) are often portrayed in very narrow and sometimes unrealistic ways. The focus is usually on their immediate grief reaction, a burning desire for revenge, or their role in pushing a detective toward solving the case. These portrayals often flatten the complexity of real-world survivorship and long-term aftermath.
Here are five of the most common ways that we are portrayed.
1. The “Revenge-Driven” Survivor
- Depiction: The survivor is consumed by rage and a need for personal justice. Sometimes they become vigilantes or take dangerous steps outside the legal system.
- Examples:
- “The Brave One” (2007) — Jodie Foster plays a woman whose fiancé is murdered; she becomes a vigilante.
- “Law Abiding Citizen” (2009) — Gerard Butler’s character seeks elaborate revenge after his family is killed and the justice system fails him.
- Impact: While rage is very real for many survivors, these stories often over-emphasize violence as a solution and oversimplify the grief process.
2. The “Frozen in Grief” Survivor
- Depiction: The survivor is shown as perpetually broken — unable to move forward, sometimes to an unrealistic degree (e.g., decades later, they are shown as unchanged).
- Examples:
- “Mystic River” (2003) — Laura Linney’s character navigates complex grief and anger after a family tragedy.
- “The Lovely Bones” (2009) — The mother, played by Rachel Weisz, is emotionally paralyzed and eventually abandons her family.
- Impact: These depictions highlight trauma but sometimes leave out the resilience, adaptation, and evolution many survivors experience over time.
3. The “Plot Device” Survivor
- Depiction: The survivor exists mainly to create tension, motivate a hero, or explain the stakes — not as a full, complex character in their own right.
- Examples:
- Any number of TV procedurals (“NCIS,” “Criminal Minds,” “CSI”) — where grieving family members appear for one scene to give information and are forgotten afterward.
- Impact: This reduces survivors to “grief props” and ignores their ongoing emotional reality.
4. The “Graceful Martyr” Survivor
- Depiction: The survivor is portrayed as nobly forgiving, superhumanly composed, and almost saintly in their ability to move past the murder.
- Examples:
- “Dead Man Walking” (1995) — The families of the victims are portrayed differently, but there’s a strong theme of forgiveness vs. anger.
- Impact: While some survivors do find peace or forgiveness, media often portrays this as the “ideal” endpoint, which can put unfair pressure on real-world survivors who are still angry, confused, or ambivalent.
5. The “Amateur Investigator” Survivor
- Depiction: The survivor becomes an amateur sleuth, uncovering hidden clues the police missed and solving the crime themselves.
- Examples:
- “Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri” (2017) — Frances McDormand’s character aggressively pressures the police for action.
- “Searching” (2018) — A father desperately investigates his daughter’s disappearance using her digital footprint.
- Impact: While persistence is very real among survivors, this depiction can oversell the idea that determination alone can overcome systemic barriers in justice.
More Realistic (but Rare) Depictions:
There are a few films that try to reflect the messy, nonlinear, painful but evolving journey of homicide survivors more honestly:
- “Manchester by the Sea” (2016) — Although not a homicide, the portrayal of grief and guilt is layered and raw.
- “Mass” (2021) — A stunning, quiet portrayal of two sets of parents — one whose son was a school shooter, the other whose son was a victim — meeting years later to process their shared grief.
These works show survivors not as tropes, but as people who wrestle with contradictions: anger and forgiveness, despair and resilience, numbness and longing.
Why It Matters:
- Unrealistic portrayals can distort public understanding of grief after homicide.
- They can also create false expectations about “getting over it,” “forgiving,” or “seeking revenge.”
- Thoughtful portrayals can help viewers build empathy and understand the nuanced reality of long-term survivorship.
