By now most homicide survivors have heard of PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder). A good number of us have been diagnosed with it. Our nightmares, hypervigilance, flashbacks, avoidance, poor concentration, memory gaps and so forth are constant reminders of how our lives were flipped.
The public first knew about PTSD as a condition associated with involvement in combat in the Vietnam War era. And, in the 1980’s it was applied to civilian traumas as well, such as natural disasters, rape, kidnapping, and fatal car crashes.
While I have objections to the term Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (see post from 8/10/2024) in favor of the term Post Traumatic Injury, I embrace the notion of Post Traumatic Growth wholeheartedly!
Why Post Traumatic Growth (PTG) remains in the shadows is beyond me. It is real. It is encouraging. It is important!
PTG
Of course, in the immediate aftermath of homicide of a loved one, none of what I’m about to say will be relevant. At that early juncture, we’re treading water. Our attention is divided. Our sleep is elusive. Our sense of isolation is frightening. Imagining a time when it isn’t on our minds all of the time is doubted.
But, as months and years drift by, we establish a new normal. There is light at the end of the long, dark tunnel. It is called Post Traumatic Growth.
What is this PTG? This concept refers to increased grit, endurance, and appreciation for life that develops from trauma. It takes time, energy, and persistence.
People who develop PTG aren’t resilient at the start. An already resilient person won’t be shaken to their core when tragedy strikes. This subset of PTSD sufferers becomes resilient. The experience increases their self-confidence and builds a new focus on helping others (Tedeschi, 1996).
PTG is experienced as having
- a greater appreciation for life
- improved relationships with others
- increased self-confidence
- spiritual change
Two traits appear to make a homicide survivor more likely to develop PTG: an outgoing personality and openness to new experiences. They’re active in their response to trauma, spend time examining it, and connect with others, perhaps through self-help groups and reading. They also tend to have these traits:
- They’re skilled at controlling their emotions. They don’t dwell, yell, act impulsively, or seek revenge.
- They focus on problem-solving. They see opportunities where others are stuck.
- They notice what is right in their lives and feel gratitude rather than bitterness.
- Adults are more likely to demonstrate PTG than children.
- They persevere and don’t give up easily.
It appears that PTG is more common than first thought. Coping with violent death optimally doesn’t just involve “getting over it” and “moving on” but adds meaning and purpose to one’s life, often by helping others. Common refrains are “the broken me turns into the best me” and “the hardest days lead to our best days.”
Once the storm is over, you won’t remember how you made it through,
how you managed to survive. You won’t even be sure
whether the storm is really over. But one thing IS certain.
When you come out of the storm you won’t be the same person who walked into it.
That’s what the storm is all about.
—Murakami
See https://www.amazon.com/Posttraumatic-Growth-Richard-G-Tedeschi/dp/1138675040 for an in-depth understanding of PTG.
