For those of us who’ve lost someone to murder, walking into a courtroom feels like crossing into a tense, sacred space. It’s where we seek justice, and answers. The person accused often becomes the embodiment of our grief, our outrage, our craving for accountability. If they’ve confessed, or if the evidence seems overwhelming, we may feel certain of their guilt. But as painful as it is to say, certainty is not the same as truth.
It’s crucial—no matter how deep our loss or how strong our beliefs—to leave room for the possibility that the system got it wrong.
The Dark Side of Confession
It may seem unimaginable that someone would admit to a murder they didn’t commit. But false confessions happen far more often than most people realize, particularly when suspects are young, mentally vulnerable, or interrogated in isolation without an attorney for hours without a break. Skilled interrogators can (and do) use psychological pressure that eventually wears people down. (See: “The Reid Technique” for more information https://leb.fbi.gov/articles/featured-articles/current-state-of-interview-and-interrogation) Fear, confusion, exhaustion, and even a desperate desire to go home can lead to confessions that bear little resemblance to reality.
According to the Innocence Project, false confessions played a role in nearly 30% of wrongful murder convictions that were later overturned by DNA evidence. Their innocence was irrefutable.
Eyewitness Testimony: Not as Reliable as It Feels
Many of us place tremendous trust in eyewitness testimony. After all, if someone saw it with their own eyes, how can it be wrong?
Yet studies show time and again that eyewitness identification is one of the least reliable forms of evidence. Memory is not a recording—it’s a reconstruction, shaped by stress, suggestion, and time. Trauma, lighting conditions, cross-racial identification errors, poor eyesight, bad weather, being rushed, and subtle influence from law enforcement can all distort what a witness believes they saw. (For a book about how this sent an innocent man to prison for rape I highly recommend the book: Picking Cotton by Jennifer Thompson https://www.amazon.com/Picking-Cotton-Memoir-Injustice-Redemption/dp/0312599536
Innocent people have gone to prison—and even death row—based solely on mistaken eyewitnesses.
However, recent research from the University of California, San Diego sheds new light on the accuracy of eyewitness accounts. Several studies found that when a witness identifies a suspect quickly—within less than a minute—their identification is far more likely to be accurate. In contrast, delays or hesitation significantly increase the risk of error. Accuracy also declines when witnesses are asked to choose from a large pool of faces, rather than being presented with fewer, more targeted options. Perhaps most concerning, the study revealed that some witnesses who were uncertain during initial lineups later expressed strong confidence—sometimes even “certainty”—when testifying in court, months or even years later. The research suggests that the most reliable method is to record the witness’s response in real time during the lineup or photo array, ideally with a timer visible. This approach makes it easier to detect hesitation, confusion, or any leading behavior by law enforcement that might influence the witness’s decision.
When the System Isn’t Playing Fair
It’s a hard truth, but some prosecutors do withhold evidence that could cast doubt on a defendant’s guilt. This is called “suppression of exculpatory evidence”, and it’s a violation of the law. Yet it happens. Why? Sometimes it’s tunnel vision. Sometimes it’s pressure to win or more concern about their re-election than the truth. And ordinary citizens cry for D.A.’s to be “tough on crime. ” That plays a role also. Sometimes it’s because the humanity of the accused has been lost in the larger pursuit of justice for the victim. (I recommend the book Getting Life by Michael Morton https://www.amazon.com/Getting-Life-Innocent-25-Year-Journey/dp/147675683X)
The Supreme Court case Brady v. Maryland made it clear that withholding such evidence is unconstitutional. But enforcement is inconsistent, and many wrongful convictions aren’t discovered until years—or decades—later. And there’s little push-back against it. Prosecutors have what is called “prosecutorial immunity.” This means they cannot be civilly sued for wrongdoing like the rest of the country. It’s essentially a free pass.
The Cost of Getting It Wrong
The average person wrongly convicted of murder serves 18 years before being exonerated—if they’re exonerated at all. Most never are. They die in prison. Their families suffer. The true perpetrator goes free, compounding the tragedy and sometimes continuing to kill again. And the taxpayers lose out also. On average, it costs $900,000+ to house a prisoner for 18+ years.
And we, as survivors, may have spent years believing that justice had been served—when in fact, it hadn’t.
Why It Matters to Us
You might be wondering: Why should we, as survivors, carry this additional burden? Isn’t it enough that we lost someone we loved?
Yes. It is enough. But we must also recognize that justice is not justice if it punishes the wrong person! No matter how brokenhearted we are, do we want someone else’s mother to lose her son or daughter wrongly? Do we want any child to grow up with a parent who was railroaded into prison?
We don’t want our legal system to trade one tragedy for another.
Being open to complexity does not dishonor our loved one’s memory. It honors our own integrity.
Leaving Room for Doubt, and for Truth
As you move through the court process, hold your beliefs gently. Stay informed. Ask questions. Remember that the appearance of guilt isn’t the same as proof. And know that our criminal justice system—while capable of good—can also fail.
We don’t have to become legal experts or detectives. But we can remain open to new information. We can push for accountability—not just from those accused, but from the system itself.
After all, if justice truly matters to us, then it matters for everyone.
